Sexual Assault: A Personal Story


For a while I have been wanting to open up my life to my readers about an event that forever changed my life.  I believe that the Lord showed me that it is time.

I wrote recently about the new rules at Target, which would allow transgenders to access ladies bathrooms and dressing rooms.  In that piece I asked what would keep a sexual predator from posing as a “transgender” person, to access their prey, and commit unspeakable crimes against women. It seems that the rights of transgenders are more important than keeping women safe from harm.

This morning I read that in 2015, Obama ordered ICE to release 19,723 criminal illegals; 900 of them had committed sexual assault crimes – back into our society. They are everywhere in our country. The states had wanted to deport them, but our president would not allow it.  I live in a sanctuary state, which makes us even more vulnerable to criminals.

Article on released illegal felons 


When I was 22 years old, I sang for a living in Washington, D.C.  I was part of a band.  I was not saved until 1983.  One evening after our band’s performance, I was attacked by two men and sexually assaulted.  I kept this horrid event secret for a very long time.  I blamed myself.  I was singing in a band and in my mind the assault had to be my fault.

When I finally sought help, I was told that this was not my fault, and that I should not be blaming myself.  I did not continue with therapy. It was too painful to speak about the rape. Every time I would talk about it, I wound up crying hysterically, and feeling worse.

Night Terrors

Within a year I began to have terrible night terrors.  I would run and scream (this is what I was told) but I would not remember doing this.  I broke bones and fell down stairs. Some times this happened 5 nights out of the week.  I thought that I was losing my mind. I didn’t seek help because I was embarrassed. But I confided in a lady from church in the 1980’s. She urged me to try to be part of a sleep study at NIH.

I was admitted into a sleep study there. I never told the neurologist about the attack.  I just couldn’t talk about it with him. I had terrors during my stay at NIH. The doctor diagnosed me with Nocturnal Panic Attack Syndrome.


It was years later that I learned that my night terror attacks were a hallmark symptom of PTSD. I thought that only soldiers struggled with this. It seems that being sexually assaulted causes PTSD too.

Gripped by fear

Everywhere I go, I am hyper vigilant. I am constantly looking over my shoulder. I will not get into an elevator with just men – I wait for a mixed crowd. I live in a constant state of fear. After I was saved in 1983, I was a bit better. I knew that Jesus was watching over me. But the scars from the attack ran deep.  The night terrors continued.  I prayed and prayed that the Lord would protect me from these terrors. It was as if the devil used my sleeping hours to attack. I was convinced that this was spiritual and not just from the rape.

After a night terror, I would begin to be cognizant of my surroundings – not remembering the terror, but I was aware that something awful had happened to me. All I remembered is that I felt as if I was dying.  The next day, my head felt like I had been in an accident and had sustained brain damage. Concentrating was difficult.

Another victim

When I was a young girl, my mother’s best friend had been shopping with her daughter. They were in the dressing room, trying on clothes. A man got into their dressing room and the man raped my mother’s friend in front of her 8 year old daughter.  Both were scarred for life.

How can they forget about our rights?

It seems so demonic to me that a store would put the “feelings” of a person who is confused about their gender, over the safety of women. This is absolutely crazy and demonically inspired.  Are they waiting for the worst case scenario to happen, and only then will this be rethought?

My prayer is that this article will help in some small way.  It was the hardest thing for me to write this, but I truly felt the Lord urging me to do it.

Come Lord Jesus

17 thoughts on “Sexual Assault: A Personal Story

  1. Shalom all. Thank you dearest sister for sharing your experience! Forced sex (Rape as its called) or moless has been going on for millennia and I think a very small percentage of men and woman can say they never experienced some kind of a sexual incident or even rape. It’s only of late that it’s been politically brought to the foreground, that the extend of this crime is realized. My heart goes out to you and others as even I know the effects it leaves on a persons mental state and outlook on life. G_D bless all of you, and all we can do is wait and hope for that great and wonderful day that the evil of this world will end even our memories will be wiped from it all. To all you mothers and daughters out there, a blessed MOTHERS & DAUGHTERS day. We need to honour and love our woman as Jesus loved the Church (Body of Believers) Remember, great one another with Maranatha, for He is surely coming again . . . . Maranatha!!!!

      1. I’m so glad that you did not. I can’t imagine how hard it was for you to write this, but there is a reason you did. Your pain and the courage you showed in writing this will not be in vain Geri. I believe in you and know that God had you do this to help someone, even if you never know that in this lifetime. Rejoice in the fact that you followed the prompting of the Lord. Many blessings to you my sister.

  2. Ma’am, you are a battle tested warrior of the faith, and very courageous! No words of mine would be useful. So let me borrow some…

    Psalm 62:1-8 (NASB)
    1 My soul waits in silence for God only; From Him is my salvation.
    2 He only is my rock and my salvation, My stronghold; I shall not be greatly shaken.
    3 How long will you assail a man, That you may murder him, all of you, Like a leaning wall, like a tottering fence?
    4 They have counseled only to thrust him down from his high position; They delight in falsehood; They bless with their mouth, But inwardly they curse. Selah.
    5 My soul, wait in silence for God only, For my hope is from Him.
    6 He only is my rock and my salvation, My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.
    7 On God my salvation and my glory rest; The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.
    8 Trust in Him at all times, O people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. Selah.

    שלום Brian

  3. I recognized what the “night terrors” were even before you explained it. I suffered from this a long time before the “night terrors” became night AND day terrors. Took a lot of time till I was diagnosed, the doctors thought it was my heart, but my heart tested out fine. It’s a terrible, terrible affliction. I passed out from one at work and was hospitalized. I asked the male nurse attending if he had ever before seen what was happening to me, and he said, “yes, in Vietnam.” I’ve been stabilized with medication but the attacks lessened with time and now I rarely have to take meds. Thank you, Lord!

  4. I really don’t know how to respond to your tragic story. It seems like the evil in this world knows no limits. Real men don’t do the things you described. Evil does exist most certainly. I am so glad that God has placed it upon your heart to relate what happened to you. It is a step towards healing. God knows all things and He will bring into account all things someday soon. God help the unrepentant hearts. This story brings to mind my pastor and his experience with pure evil. To make a long story short, his brother was murdered and the perpetrator was caught and sentenced to prison. To this day and after several appeals, the perpetrator has yet to live up to his act of evil. The road was and is a bitter one in which my pastor has had to struggle to forgive, as God commands. I can’t understand how hard this must be, as in your case. My first reaction would be to grab this person by the neck. But God has said, vengeance is mine. A concept that goes against all normal bounds of human thinking. But my personal vengeance would be short lived and to fall into the hands of a wrathful God makes much more sense. We unfortunately live in a fallen world and evil will crop up from time to time. But God has a plan for our lives and its eternal. Our day of sunshine and joy is coming, sooner than later. God bless you. Your story is a real inspiration to all who struggle with tragedy in their lives. Thank you for sharing. I will pray my utmost for you. Shalom b’ Yeshua

  5. Geri, I can tell you as a victim myself, that your obedience to the Holy Spirit was for someone’s benefit, probably more than one, just as for me, another woman was obedient to the Lord in sharing her story for the first time 12 years ago which facilitated the Lord’s healing in me. She was visibly shaken and I could tell how hard it was for her, and at the same time it was traumatic for me to hear, but in the end, she was able to encourage me and continue her own healing. God takes those broken things and He makes something beautiful from them when we are willing to open up in faith and courage like you did. Now I am doing the same with a dear person in my life.

  6. It must have been traumatic even now after almost 50 years to write about this event. Do doubt you will be blessed with the release and removal of this weight
    from your shoulders. In addition you will have helped many that carry scars from
    being assaulted including other form of attack. You are most courageous Geri, thank you for your witness and strong condemnation of the Target decision to
    allow transgender into women’s bathrooms.
    Wilhelmus Heggers Bridgetown Western Australia

  7. snappyj123

    God bless you for sharing that story, Geri. I can’t imagine the horror of that. It happened to my Mom too when she was young and it affected her all her life. I don’t know if she ever really came to terms with it. I told her that she needed to forgive so that she didn’t have to carry around that burden, but we can only say things–who knows what we would do?/ It’s shocking what Target is doing and I won’t shop there again, but I drove by today and the parking lot was full. People don’t get it or don’t care, I don’t understand but it breaks my heart.

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